The Curse of Invisibility

Some think of Invisibility as a fictional super-power from the comic books of our youth. We might think it an incredible gift.

The reality is, it’s a curse for many people who experience it daily.

Perhaps it’s a family member; your wife or your kids. They feel invisible to you or in society overall.

So in response, they do things that are not natural to stand out. They try to dress provocatively. Or they dye their hair pink or blue or something.

They do anything to try to gain some attention where none has been previously given.

I know a woman who had weight loss surgery years ago. I’ll never forget our conversation. I asked asked her what the biggest change was for her now slimmed-down self.

“I’m no longer Invisible to Men”, she said.

This woman had felt the sting of invisibility. She would tell me that previously men would simply look right through her like she wasn’t even there. No one opened the door for her. No one paid her any attention unless it was to look at her with some sense of disgust.

I don’t think this is an issue with just women. Men can go through this as well.

They come home from work and no one, save the dog, acknowledges their presence. They have become as interesting as the old sofa in front of the TV; that place where they live out their existence for the next 12 hours or so until it’s time to leave again for work.

We read about being Zeroed Out. That phrase can apply to many aspects of our lives: work, relationships, society in general…

So, the Invisible Masses do whatever they can to become a real person again. Often the efforts are sad and ridiculous.

Like Pinocchio and his quest to be a real boy. He will do anything he can to get there.

This time of year can be really intense for many with the holidays… dysfunctional families… forced merriment… alcohol… depression… suicide… the list goes on.

So many feel left out, hopeless, helpless…

It’s times like these where the rest of us can show a bit more empathy, a bit more caring and compassion,

We listen. We ask open ended questions. We engage the invisible.

By these simple acts of conversation, we allow that person to feel real again.

This may seem like gibberish to you. If so, you’ve likely never felt zeroed out. If that’s so, you are truly blessed.

Take a minute this week (and every week henceforth) to engage those you meet. Ask them how they are doing and then really try to listen. Don’t just keep walking by.

This is the most difficult time of year for so many. You can make the difference for many. We get so busy with our own struggles that we often get into a tunnel vision of our own path.

Take a minute and be human. Shine your light on everyone you meet.

Merry Christmas from Tex and curvey!

3 comments… add one
  • MDale Dec 29, 2019 @ 22:29

    This is dead on. A fellow Marine is now a close friend, partly because I spotted him. He was feeling invisible and lonely, and getting him into a Friday night Bible study, got him out of his shell. As Men, we have to start looking for opportunities to lift others up. It’s a crucial task, and it sets true leaders apart from people who are just in charge.

    • texasdom Dec 30, 2019 @ 4:36

      Thank you for taking that step Dale.

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